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Pandemonium in Public
B e l i e f S y s t e m s
This Months Feature Articles...
How A Simple Breakfast Conversation Changed the World
Mindset: The Importance of Mentors
Every parents nightmare
This program gives children the ability to sort and structure the distorted noise of visual and auditory information.
It's about understanding yourself and your unique abilities
It's about failing forwards
It's about seeing the world through the "Yes! I can do all things I put my mind too!" lens
It's about giving the children who feel they are the misfits, the abilities and confidence to know where they fit
It's about harnessing their ability to use their creativity in new ways
This program unleashes the genius within
Are You Worried Your Child Is Slipping Behind The Rest Of The Class?
Many parents are at a loss when trying to understand the difficulties their child goes through in the class room. It's not uncommon for them to feel guilty about the struggle which their child endures.
Patterns is a Mentoring Program for kids who think differently. These are the beautiful souls who don't respond well to the conventional schooling methods.
Often times these kids are brilliant. They just have a different learning style.
It's a 10 week program
Group numbers are limited to 6
Groups meet each Monday and Tuesday between 4 and 5pm.
Cost is $35 per session for each child
Sessions are held at 180 South Pine Rd Alderley
Call Sandy for appointments on 0413141605 or email firstname.lastname@example.org
A Mentoring Program for kids who think differently
BS stands for Belief Systems
Pandemonium in Public
Who is Sandy Hobley
How a Simple Breakfast Conversation Changed the World
Training and Courses
Mindset and the Importance of Mentors
Welcome to the April 2015 edition of BS Magazine
Your challenge should you choose to accept it is to discover the truth about yourself and go beyond your comfort zone to a place which sets you free.
You see, all your life you have been conditioned by the people who have input into your world. They were well meaning and only desired the best for your you, however it was their best... not yours.
You are so unique... and so gifted. You learn differently to everybody else and you know stuff nobody else knows. You have so much to offer... but unless you are true to yourself and unleash the real you, your gift will be wasted.
Will you come along on this journey?
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By Sandy Hobley
I saw this image of water droplets the other day and I began to think of their isolation and individuality. Water droplets, are just little bubbles of water but if you connect enough of them they can become a river that has power to flow to the sea. Now I know water bubbles are different to beliefs, but if we believe we can then all our beliefs connect up together and it becomes powerful like a river that runs to the sea... the sea representing vast opportunities.
Belief Systems... what does that mean and why is it important for a child to have strong belief systems around their learnings?
Let's look at it this way. What we say we believe is really referring to the subconscious and conscious conclusions we have developed about the world around us and how we fit or play our part in it. So let's unpack that statement a little bit. If a child in school thinks they are the dumb one in the classroom, the underlying belief is huge. It signals that self confidence and self esteem are shattered Which then allows them to be vulnerable and easily lead astray.
Our belief system is also tied to our self talk or in the case of some of the children I have spoken to it's more like self screaming and yelling.
Let me share a story with you.
I knew of a young girl who no matter how hard she tried, she struggled in school. Her teacher would always catch her asking her friends what she had to do, but her teacher always thought she was just talking and distracting the other kids around her, so she was moved to sit on her own.
The teacher thought that would stop all of her chatter, but she just imploded and never seem to get any of her work completed. Sometimes she would do the complete opposite of what she had been asked to do.
Why she was imploding? She began to tell herself that she was dumb and stupid and that no one liked her. Even though she had a friend, she thought that friend only like her because she was being nice.
This little girl had been a happy little girl but now she was developing signs of depression and became a very sensitive child.
She was always in a state of fight, flight and flee. Her adrenalin glands were working overtime and she had lost any sense of peace within her mind and her body. She thought she must have been an alien or something, why wasn't she like the other kids. What was wrong with her?
Many nights she would cry herself to sleep asking the question why me and the pleadings of I just want to fit in, I don't want to be different. She never said anything to anyone and no one asked her what was going on in her mind.
No-one built with her a full function belief system that told her the truth, she had learning issues. She wasn't an alien or missed out when brains were handed out. She was a beautiful, normal little girl who would most likely struggle to learn her whole life. Had someone intervened and helped her work on her belief about learning then I know for sure that she would have gotten better grades in school and would have been a far happier child.
You see you can't just let belief systems control you, you have to build them like you would a house. Belief systems are the strong walls that hold the house solid to the ground and hold it square. Once the structure is formed then all the walls internally and externally can be put in place. You don't build a house without a plan, or blueprint. We humans just bumble along and then one day our lives are falling apart and we are told its because of our belief system.
Our relationships and friendships work from our belief system. We will let someone be horrible to us just because we think we deserve it, or it is my lot in life or it's just the way it is.
In everything I do I believe 100%, if your belief system is healthy then you life will be healthy.
If you believe you can't then you are right or if you believe you can you are right.
By the way if you hadn't guessed it, that little girl was me.
My belief system copped a hiding over the years and still to this day I am working on it regularly questioning myself, "Is that my belief system, or is it someone else's who didn't really know me and never took the time to answer any of my questions about what I knew to be the truth?"
A young child needs to be taught to fail forwards, and not be afraid of failure. True failure is only when you give up and walk away never to return to what you were trying to learn.
2 years ago I wanted to test my belief system. I loved writing but never really did it because I wrote sentences around the wrong way, punctuation was shocking. But a mentor of mine Mr Pat Mesiti said from stage that I could write a book. Now he was speaking to everyone in the room but I heard his words and took action, firstly on my belief system.
What if I could ?
How would that make me feel?
My belief system was alive and on alert, a book is physical evidence of what is in your mind showing up on paper. What I did was write the book in 18 hours, a couple of hours per night as I looked deep within myself and explored the girl who was hiding inside of me. Line after line, page after page, I found out that I believed in me and I was capable of anything I put my mind to.
I was capable of doing it because I was doing it... Writing my book that is.
I was soooooo hooked on the feeling that I decided to write 14 in that year. Everyone told me I couldn't do it, even my husband! But as they landed in his inbox to be edited and converted into books he was soon chanting my praise.
14 books in a year... Guess what happened to my belief system?
You guessed it, I now question it daily...
and the question... "Is this my belief, or is it somebody else's?"
BS stands for
A child is lying on the floor of a busy shopping centre, screaming and flailing their arms and legs uncontrollably. Everyone has stopped and the whole area is looking on.
Some people are concerned and nervously dither around wondering how to help,
some are heavily affected and just want to get away immediately,
some are angry and abusing the parent for not controlling their child.
In the pandemonium a mild form of panic begins to engulf the crowd. Security arrives but cannot deal with things because they cannot understand the problem.
What's really going on here?
The truth is the child is in overwhelm possibly from something as simple as flicker from the fluoro lighting.
The embarrassed parent calmly gathers the child from the floor and wrestles to get it outside. The murmur of judgment follows them until security clears the area and moves everyone along.
The remnant is the trauma for both the child and the parent. Neither really know what set the incident in motion. All they know is they cannot take the child into a shopping centre. This is a stress which many families deal with every day.
Epilepsy, autism, aspergers, dyslexia, attention deficit disorder and their variants all have some sensitivity to light to varying degrees.
Is their any scientifically backed evidence, to say that Fluoro's affect people?
Actually, yes there is!
According to Wikipedia it is called light sensitivity or photo-sensitivity which refers to a notable increase in re-activity to light.
Wikipedia goes on to report... Apart from vision, human beings have many physiological and psychological responses to light. In rare individuals a non conforming response may result in serious discomfort, disease, or injury. Also, some drugs have a photo-sensitising effect. The properties of natural or artificial light that may abnormally affect people include:
Timing of light (upset of normal circadian rhythms, seasonal effective disorders, sleep disorders)
Intensity of light (photophobia, sunburn, skin cancer)
Wavelength of light (in the lupus, urticaria)
Rapid flickers in intensity of light may trigger or aggravate photosensitive epilepsy, epileptic seizure or migraine headaches
Conditions that may include sensitivity to light include vertigo and chronic fatigue syndrome.
In my experience, the 100's of people with learning issues that I have spoken to all say the same thing... fluoro lights makes them sick, they can feel them and they can hear them, they make them feel like they are being crushed.
They can hear a high pitch scream in their heads from them, they feel like the roof is crushing in on them, they get vertigo, physically sick, extremely tired and end up in melt down in very short spaces of time.
Now just think about our classrooms just for a moment, the rooms are full of fluoro lights.
Then let's look at circadian rhythms, people with learning issues have very sensitive body systems and it doesn't take much for us to feel out of balance, if we feel out of balance our brain refuses to function. All it wants to do is run, hide or cry, or it gets angry and frustrated.
To give you a picture, it is like a pressure cooker that you have overfilled. It is struggling to keep the lid on and in most cases the lid breaks lose and you have a mess to clean up... Kind if like the tears and tantrums I described above.
We can hear the sound of the light which is so high pitched that normally only dogs can hear it, but also we can feel it pulsating with in our body.
Let me explain pulsating. It is like our own unique vibration going on in our body. What happens is certain outside frequencies (either sounds or vibrations) beat against our own rhythm and we get our breathing messed up, we don't know which is our beat and which is the lights beat, which means our oxygenation intake is messed up, so then we feel afraid of dying and it is very real.
This brings on a panic attack that doesn't show the normal signs because it's not coming from our heart but our head. We are so sensitive we can feel the blood flow in our brain and the screaming in our brain with the feeling of extreme confusion is beyond pleasurable.
I can't scream it enough from the mountain tops, we are hurting our kids with fluoro lights. Am I an advocate for changing lighting in schools and shopping centres? You bet I am, but like everything it is no good starting out a full sized war without a solution... one which I am actively looking for.
I teach children especially how to cope with the invasion of lights on our brains, in the "Patterns Mentoring Program".
Let's look at shopping centres when you suddenly hear a child scream out. You see, I can hear the pitch of overwhelm in the scream. It's a very high pitch and it's uncontrolled which matches the child's feeling. They just want to get out of there. They can't find a way to stop the screaming in their head and the feeling of overwhelm, so you hear it out through their mouth.
As humans we are designed to move away from pain and towards pleasure... and that is all this poor child is wanting to do.
But Sandy I need to go shopping? I get that. Before I go to the shops myself and especially of I go with any of my daughters or grandchildren, we pull down a protective glass wall.
A What ????
Remember back to Maxwell Smart, the cone of silence? I saw that one day as my brother watched the show and I was hooked. I have now used my cone of silence for about 40 years and my family uses it.
We can still see everything but we have trained our mind to know we are safe with in our own mind, the overwhelmed feeling and melt downs have been controlled.
My grandson used to run off and hide under clothes and be a pain to shop with, this now doesn't happen since I helped him use this technique.
Shopping centres have music or announcements coming from the roof speakers, it's a nightmare for anyone who is already struggling with the lights and adds another dimension into the mix. Here we have overwhelmed parents who just want to get in and get out... with a child who just wants to get out, like now!!!
Just like laughter, stress is contagious. People pick it up and feel it not knowing why they suddenly feel overwhelmed. You see, as humans we are programmed to pick up fear signals. We can find them in a shopping centre, a work place, pretty much everywhere. If we pick up the signal and we do it fast, we may not know where it's come from. We just know how we want to get away from it, hence we leave the shopping centre.
If any of this has made sense to you, have a qualified person you trust to check your lights in your house. Have them look for faults which could cause flicker or a constant noisy hum or vibration. Ask them if they know of alternatives which will output a more constant, noise free light. Afterall, the last thing you as a parent want to be doing is unknowingly harming your children.
If you are unable to get a valued response, contact me and I will connect you to to my guy. He understands because he has a daughter that is affected by fluoro lights. He knows what he is looking for and he takes guidance from me when needed.
I can be reached at email@example.com and I will pass your details on.
Alan Sparks and the EastCoast team
How A Simple Breakfast Conversation Changed the World
Even though you never know who you are going to meet when you go to a function of any kind, my next statement is the one I really want you to pay attention too.
You never know what you are going to change with the person you meet at a function.
Let me help you understand what I mean. I was invited to a Salvation Army Breakfast which was a a fund raiser for mental illness. I love fund raisers! They help change lives for the better and give people a chance to be the person they were created to be.
I sat on the table I was assigned to with my beautiful friend Dianne. Now what I have found is men don't know how to start a conversation, so you get a question like "What's your Name, Rank and Serial number?" or in civilian terms, "Who are you and what do you do?"
As we went around the table, I said my piece and Alan Sparks from East Coast Apprenticeships was sitting next to me. Once he explained what he did, I discovered this man was a compassionate, wonderful human being. He saw what he said was brilliant young men walk out of the door at East Coast for what seem like no apparent reason.
He explained they took them to a huge room and gave the young people a written literacy and numeracy test to do. When they would come back 15 minutes later the test was untouched and the young person was gone. He was baffled as to why this was happening more and more.
I told him that's how I would react too and then told him why. You see they were most probably struggling with many layers of fears and phoba's. It's highly likely they imagined a job using their hands and never having to return to school. Within dyslexia my brain races out of control in front of a test. The pressure makes me unable to keep anything still on the page. Huge panic attacks set in and I end up in total overwhelm. My first instinct is to get out of there as fast as I can.
But as I spoke with Alan, he said he was going to sort it... and he did.
He found a program called a QTest which measures the way the young persons brain is wired. Then when they sat down and did the written test the young person knew they we intelligent and that East Coast understood them. East Coast accepted that testing and written work was not their strong point. They supported the student by helping them believe they were not going to be discriminated against for the first time in their lives. Basically East Coast had already told them how smart they were.
What Alan and the team at East Coast saw was how different the young peoples minds worked and how fast they were at constructing patterns, deciphering codes and working with grids.
East Coast is the first organisation to have run a fully dyslexic program, which opened up to all learning issues. This means young people with Aspergers, ADHD or many of the other issues that would prevent these beautiful young people getting jobs in the field or trades is now not the case.
The problem now is no longer with the young people not getting their trade qualifications and help with Tafe, but with the lack of employers taking the young people on. When employers have so many young people applying for work they still think young people with a learning issue are the problem ones. And because they would have to be considerate of not just giving verbal instructions but written instructions, people think the young person without the issues is the best choice.
This is a shame for so many reasons. Anyone who is wired differently in the brain with what the world tags as learning issues are really some of the most valuable employees.
They see the world differently, which opens up new markets for organisations. They are massively creative and one young man who East Coast placed in a printing company at Brendale is now doing a lot of the graphics for business cards, flyers etc.
What the employer thought he was getting was an apprentice in one area but he got a amazing young man who has taken his business to another level. He has another service that he can offer his clients, at no extra Cost to his business!
If you own a business then do your self a favour talk to Alan at East Coast. A conversation will never hurt you, but you could end up with a remarkable young person in your business who will take you and your business to a whole new level... And I say you because what people with learning issues struggle with in one area is what you struggle with in another.
What are you waiting for? Pick up the phone and have a conversation.
East Coast Apprenticeships have offices from Upper Mt Gravatt to Bundaberg. HQ is in Strathpine, around 30mins north of the Brisbane CBD.
You can call Alan here by dialing (07) 3881 3166
Having researched Dyslexia and the impact it has on Australians, we discovered those diagnosed with dyslexia can achieve high levels of learning but are often challenged by standard learning practices. Particularly where there is a heavy reliance on written text.
In order to help combat this misunderstanding and consequent lack of support, East Coast Apprenticeships now provides a unique structured apprentice and trainee recruitment, retention and completion support service for South East Queenslanders with Dyslexia.
The Dyslexia Support Program uses tailored tools and mentoring techniques to encourage and facilitate successful participation in and completion of traineeships and apprenticeships.
Because testing a person with dyslexia via the functional skills test can set them up to fail, East Coast programs has adopted the use of a language free assessment tool called Q-Test which helps identify trainability in our candidates. This has also shown to motivate and encourage participants. By using this tool along with the rest of our robust and mature selection process we have increased retention within our Apprenticeships.
This program also requires a number of supporting partnerships working collaboratively with apprentices and trainees to refine a flexible and relevant pathway to success.
Contact Program Manager, Heather Russell on (07) 3480 7454 OR email firstname.lastname@example.org
"You're in Good Company"
They say it takes a village to raise a child, but I think sometimes it takes a child to raise a village!
In my book “Pathway to Prosperity, 12 Steps to Financial Freedom” I talk about the one day, some day mentality. You know the story... it’s where things are always going to come in the future rather than now.
People all over the place are making statements of one day we’re going to strike it rich, or someday I’ll own a car like that and many other future placed comments. I really believe these statements are throw away comments. Placing things in the future removes the accountability. The truth is, the only time to take action is now. You are thinking about it anyway so it’s time to step up and do something.
Right now, your future is still able to be shaped into the kind of place you want it to be. Waiting until you get there without doing anything about your direction pretty much guarantees you will end up anywhere life chooses to take you.
Ask yourself this, “What kind of things do you want to experience in your life?” Do your current actions allow these things to become reality?
If not, why not? Are these really the things you want to do? How badly do you want them? You see, if these things are big enough on your to do list, you will be setting things in motion to make them happen. If you want a piano, you can save to make it happen. If your goal is to help children in third world countries, you can join an organisation which is doing it.
Sports people all have a goal to compete at the highest level. They sacrifice much in order to have the opportunity to be recognised among the elite in their field. Their focus on the end game is sharp and direct. They know without a shadow of a doubt where they want to be and can see themselves in their minds eye already in that place.
Notice I said “see themselves in their minds eye”. This is where the importance of mindset comes in. You see, success happens in the mind long before it happens in reality. You have to think it first, believe it, then receive it. Your mind is a powerful thing. Sadly many leave it untapped their whole lives. If you’re a dream chaser, someone who has a goal to achieve, a success seeker... then you already know the significance of your mindset. Most likely you will have a mentor who is guiding you along and holding you accountable.
It’s this accountability which keeps you on the path. Mentors provide you with the short cut, the fast track if you like, to reach your milestones by making you responsible for your decisions. They will assist you with the best decision and keep you moving towards your goals by giving you deadlines to get things done by.
Often time’s tight deadlines cause obstacles to surface. These are not deal breakers, they are usually growth points. By overcoming the obstacle and getting to the milestone by the deadline your sense of achievement is that much sweeter. But without a strong resolve and a mentor to prod you into action, these obstacles can become major stumbling blocks.
Look, an obstacle is just a problem which needs to be solved. As big as they seem, it’s all in your mind. You can overcome them if you apply yourself but this is where the mentor is invaluable. He/she can give you the inspiration needed to motivate you to find the way through. You already know the way anyway, you just need the help of an outside view to give you another perspective on things. A good mentor will be firm and straight with you, with empathy. They will call a spade, a spade and rely on you to rise to the occasion. They will know where you are and have the right words of encouragement at the right time to support your mindset. No matter what they say or do to encourage and motivate, you still have to make your way through. You can’t achieve something by having someone else do it for you. It’s your goal, your destiny, this means you have to do it.
By now I imagine you are asking yourself what a mentor will cost you. Well let’s flip it and ask, “What are you worth?” Your personal development is the kind of thing which can pay you back far more than you spend on it.
All the most successful people in the world have mentors. They leverage their knowledge and launch themselves even further. I call this standing on the shoulders of giants. Having a mentor gives you access to far more than just guidance. Mentors have wisdom and knowledge which is hard won. In fact, if you choose your mentor wisely you advance yourself much further than you ever could have done on your own.
So in my opinion it’s not about the price, it’s about the value.
You need to look at what you are worth, the value you place on yourself, your time and your ability to grow. Any mentor will want to be paid for their knowledge. Think of it as an investment in yourself.
Benjamin Franklin said, ‘Genius without education is like silver in the mine!” Mentors are very good at seeing the genius in a person. And by asking the right questions, introducing the right people or enabling the right access, the genius is unleashed.
Benjamin Franklin also said, "The only thing more expensive than education is ignorance." In my opinion, there is nothing truer.
By Pat Mesiti
Who is Sandy Hobley?
I am passionate about making a difference in people's lives.
Having a learning difficulty does not exclude you from being able to learn. It simply means you learn differently. You need to embrace your learning style to achieve your goals and dreams. Some people learn by ordinary means and some by extraordinary means.
I know because I lived the first 50 years of my life believing I was not as smart as the rest of the world around me. It had damaging consequences and limited my opportunities, mostly due to my own mindset.
But that's all changed. I was faced with a public admission by one of my mentors. It was as confronting as it was empowering. All I could think of was, “How did he get away with saying that?”
Well actually it was not such a big deal. The truth was I had made it a big deal. My life's experience had left me in a place where I could not step up because I was in fear and shame. I didn't even admit it to myself, I just wouldn't go there. Every time I had a chance to rise above my own limitations I would make excuses and talk myself out of it.
I was trapped.
Trapped by my own internal beliefs and it is little wonder really. The things I endured during my school years and then the mistakes I innocently made in my early working career, effectively stunted my growth. I was bound up, unable to progress beyond where I was comfortable.
It’s not so unusual actually. These days I meet people every day who fell for the same spell.
So I decided to do something about it. Firstly, I had to step up. Instead of looking for the inspiration, I needed to become the inspiration.
How did I do this? I just made a decision. I became very focused. I deliberately stepped way outside my comfort zone and spoke possibly the most naked truth I had ever shared... and it was publicly to a room full of around 200 people who were mostly strangers.
I felt like jelly. But I was resolved to carry through. After all, I had come this far in life and was pretty much stuck in the same rut I had been in for the last 30+ years. If I was to empower others, I had to take the lead and show the way.
What happened next was nothing short of miraculous. When I stepped off the stage, people came to me with inquiring looks. Questions from all age groups were thrusting into my personal space.
What had I done? Or should I say, what had I unleashed?
I was met by a young girl who had been heavily impacted by my words. She said, "Show me what you see because I might be just like you". No sooner had I tried to talk to her than a man came and told me, "I haven't told my kids about my learning issues because I didn't want them to think less of me".
These people were feeling relief. They were discovering their truth. I had somehow opened a door which they were willing to walk through. It was like the light was on, their darkness was gone and people didn't judge them anymore.
We all united in the moment and saw for the first time, we were not abnormal. We were not “stunted” or “unable” as we had been lead to believe... We were gifted! All of us! All realising we had been given a unique role which was predestined since birth.
We embraced it head on and so began the change which we all needed to move forward.
In many ways this moment was the catalyst for growth; a renewing of our minds. An opening of our hearts which allowed us to accept much of what we went through in our childhood as being someone else’s problem.
It was not our fault after all! They simply had no ability to understand us. It was kind of not their fault either. They were just following the system the way the teaching manual instructed.
What a relief! No longer were we shackled with these old judgments. They were wrong. They had no power over us anymore. It was such a life changing, emotion filled time that I am not the same today as I was before.
I have lifted beyond my wildest imagination to become the one who opens the door and offers people the chance to understand learning issues from the inside.
I am taking up the cause… the question is will you help me?
Do you want to take your knowledge to a whole new level?
Go on, you know you want to...
Learning Issues Inside Domestic Violence (Assured Confidence)
Patterns Mentoring Program
D.E.B.S. Dyslexic Entrepreneurs Business System
Sense of Self
Mums and Bub's Program
AYE Family Renewal Program (NEW in 2015)
Webinars (NEW in 2015)
The encouraging and empowering story of a woman who realised her own giftedness; a woman who chose to rise above her own personal handicaps, to lift others from their despair to a place of self belief and self confidence.
Staring her straight in the face was a situation she had wrestled with daily since her childhood. Sandy was not about to let this young girl suffer the same way she had. For the first 50 years of her life, Sandy had been dealing with what she thought was a disability. Then through an unexpected encounter, she turned her life on its head. By deliberately facing her demons and “having a red hot go” in true Aussie style, she became an advocate for all who suffer learning difficulties.
This book follows Sandy's life and gives her a voice. It tells of her beliefs and her liberation from the lies which were instilled in her through her school years. It was written in 9 non-consecutive days from December 2012 to February 2013, in little more than 2 hours each time she sat down to write... a total of almost 40,000 words!
The final manuscript was printed and released on March 14th 2013 to an enthusiastic crowd who immediately bought half the pre-release copies, many of them personally signed.
You can have your own copy by clicking on the book image. The link will take you to the Amazon sales page for the book.
Or if you have a Kindle reader, follow this link...
Embracing Dyslexia for Kindle
Embracing Dyslexia Training and Courses
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The Chronicles of a Personal Realisation